Hitting the Send Button

I thought I had it under control.

I thought I knew how to make sure it wouldn’t become an issue.

But now I sit and know it isn’t true.

I stare at a finished article. One part of my brain says, “Get your email ready, attach the file and hit send.”

The other part says, “Read it one more time. What if you missed something? What if you could change one more word? What if you could move a sentence or a paragraph? What if you could make it better?”

I just need one, two, maybe five minutes max, I tell myself. It’s not quite ready. Just one more time. I promise only one more time to read it.

Instead, I shake my head, close my eyes, breathe, put my head in my hands and slowly pull my fingers through my hair.

Yes, my greatest strength is truly my greatest weakness.

I am still a perfectionist.

I take another deep breath, sit up straight, stretch my arms in front of me and stare at the article.

It will have to be ready. I write my email, attach the file and hit send.

I’m attempting to take part in the “The Fifth Annual Slice of Life Story Challenge” through the month of March. The challenge is run by Two Writing Teachers.

Posted

March 21, 2012

Slice of Life, writing

jessica

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Comments

8 responses to “Hitting the Send Button”

Maria

March 21, 2012

I hear you.

I click send, and then refuse to read it again. Yes, that’s my confession. All those blog posts, all those reviews and Star Wars Thursday posts…

Once I click “submit” or “send”, I can’t go read them.

Reply
1. Jessica Whitmore
  
  March 21, 2012
  
  I rarely reread my published work. I’ll glance over it but not read it in detail. 🙂
  
  Reply
Jennifer Burton

March 21, 2012

I so know that feeling and as a result email, articles can take soooo long. This challenge has been good to help me get over that – when you’re doing this every day there’s only so much you can perfect. There’s just not enough time. How about you? Has it helped?

Reply
1. Jessica Whitmore
  
  March 21, 2012
  
  Yes. This challenge has helped me with just writing and publishing. 🙂
  
  Reply
pamelahodges

March 21, 2012

I take another deep breath, sit up straight, stretch my arms in front of me and stare at the article.

You sent it! Any some point in time a work of art is done. Is it believing in your work? Or that you think it could be better?
I re-read my writing in the slice maybe once or twice, and have caught a few places where I have repeated a word. Which is different from sending an attachment, and you can not make changes after that.
A true story of bravery today Jessica.

Reply
Barbara

March 21, 2012

I definitely could feel your struggle as I read this post. Being a perfectionist in different areas of my life… I know exactly what you are talking about. Sometimes I just have to breathe…and let it go… It’s definitely hard to do

Reply
JenniferM

March 21, 2012

I have never really published anything (other than blog posts…) but I am a complete perfectionist! Your post really spoke to me. Even just with blogging, I re-read and edit and then never want to look at it again after I hit “publish”. Luckily, the SOL community has encouraged me so much, or I probably would never have the courage to blog at all!

Reply
mj

March 21, 2012

A agree. Hitting send is when I always second-guess my ideas, the way I said them, whether I want to commit to cyber-space. A simple movement that is hard to do.

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